Aliviah's journey to our family (this is a long one)

Four years ago today my husband and officially decided to proceed with the adoption plan. During that four years we had two different adoption agency. The first one turned David and I down because they were looking for families that already had children in the home. Talk about a knife in the heart. It totally made me feel like I was unfit to be a mom. It took me a few months to jump back on the bandwagon with 3 failed infertility procedures and now an adoption agency turning us down I was crushed and didn't understand why God was putting us through this. I questioned God a lot during this time. Not that I had a right to He had a perfect plan for us.

The next agency I called was to Nebraska Children's Home who has been serving Nebraska since the 1890s so they obviously know what they are doing. When I talked to the lady on the other end and I asked how much the informational meeting cost (yes most agencies charge for every little thing) she told me they don't charge for their their services. The only payment they require is that we use our time, treasures, and talents. I didn't quite understood that but we decided to go to their  informational meeting. That meeting was the beginning of our official adoption journey.

That meeting was in February 2011 and in July 2011 we went to a weekend class  6 hours away I. grand Island, Nebraska. We left on a Thursday evening and were in class all day Friday and half day Saturday. This class had so much information it was almost overwhelming. But it was the turning moment in my life. Up until that point I was leery about the whole adoption experience. I thought like most people think that I didn't want to share my child with them and I didn't want to co-parent. Boy was I so naive about the whole thing. They had real life adoption stories come and talk to the group from birth mothers and fathers to adoptive parents and even grown adult adopted children on what it was like growing up in an open adopted relationships. This class and their story changed my mind a complete 180 degrees. After that class I was excited to get to share this journey with our birth family whoever they may be. After that class we had an interview with the agency.

In November 2011 David and I were officially on the active waiting adoptive families list.  We started to go to our monthly PREPARE meetings month after month year after year hardly missing any of these classes. We took classes from car seat safety to how to have an open adoption. In the 2 1/2 years  we went to these classes we never once had a repeat topic.

Two years almost to the day that we started our PREPARE classes God allowed me to get the contact I've been wanting to hear for the last 2 1/2 years! The next 8 months we full of preparing and home studies and paperwork lots and lots of paperwork. The little bundle of joy that we were about to welcome into our family was going to be born in Ohio and our agency only services Nebraska so I contacted my case worker and she said she would still help me and help find us a lawyer there in Ohio. It was such a wonderful easy transition because of our case worker she was amazing! Our daughter was due June 15.2014 so on June 12, 2014 David and I boarded a plane to Ohio

The  next week we spent it hanging with our family and taking Aliviah's birth siblings to the park to play and waiting for Aliviah to make her grand entrance. On June 21,2014 at. 2:50 am my beautiful little girl  Aliviah Macelle made he way to my arms. Getting to be privileged to watch her be born is something not very many adopted mothers get to experience. I am so grateful I was able to be there. There is no greater joy. The next day David had to head back to Omaha because he didn't have anymore time off work.  So over the next few days it was just me visiting Aliviah. My emotions were all over the place. I was extremely happy to finally be a mom after 9 years of marriage but on the other hand my heart was shattering into a million pieces to her birth family . I would  try to be strong for her but I would cry for her too. I love her so much and hated seeing her in pain. Somehow I felt like  I was taking something away from her. But then God reminded me that she chose us because she loves Aliviah and wants what is best for her and she loves Aliviah with all that she has. I am eternally grateful for  Aliviah's birth family. They made the greatest sacrifice anyone  human can make. Adoption is the closest we will understand the sacrifice God made when he chose to give his only begotten some so that we can be adopted in his family. Just like I had to choose to adopt Aliviah we have to choose to be adopted in Christ 's family .

On July 9, 2014 my parents and I packed up the rental car and we headed on our long road trip from Ohio to Nebraska. Having Aliviah in our lives has been the greatest part of my life. God has had Aliviah planned for us from the very beginning of time. She is truly the easiest happiest baby. On March 10,2015 we finally get to go to court to finalize her adoption but that is just a piece of paper. So ALiviah didn't grow under my heart for 9 months she grew in my heart for 9 years.

3 months later

I can't believe Aliviah will be 3 months tomorrow. She seriously changes every day. I love her little smiles and laughs. She even rolled over in the last week. I'm excited to watch her hit her milestones but it makes me sad on how fast she is growing up. 

We are halfway through our required 6 post placement home studies in order for us to apply for a court date to finalize our adoption. We should be able to apply for the court date around January 2nd. 

Our agency has asked David and I to come and talk to the PREPARE group in October. Although it is such an honor to be able to come and talk to the group I can't help feel a little anxious. It was only a few months ago that David and I were sitting on the other end of the classroom to learn and hear other people's story and many of the other couples there we sat next to and socialized with and they are still waiting. We are truly blessed to have little Ms in our lives and she is truly a gift from God.

 

Life with a newborn

Aliviah is now 2 months old and we have been back in Nebraska for 6 weeks. It's crazy how fast the time with her is flying by. It took us a little while to understand her cries and needs but she is fitting in to our family just beautifully. We already had 2 post placement visits since she has been home. Only 4 more to go until we can apply for a court date to finalize. Yeah! The only issue non issue we have had is dealing with our medical insurance to get her added. They didn't want to add her because we haven't finalized even though we sent all the corresponding paperwork. Thank goodness for an awesome social worker who called our carrier directly and we were finally able to get her added.

I've had a rough emotional week. I started back at work this week and being away from her is so extremely rough on me. Way harder than I ever imagined. I can't wait to stay home with her and I am doing everything possible to make that happen now. But on a plus side it has given daddy some one on one bonding time with her and he is enjoying every minute of it. So much so it totally changed our Labor Day weekend plans. David was supposed to go visit his family in Oregon that weekend but he couldn't stand to be away from Aliviah and wanted to take her with and of course being gone away from her for 10 hours rips my heart out I couldn't even begin to spend a whole weekend without the love of my life and my daughter so we decided to make it a family affair. So Aliviah will be going on her first ever plane ride next weekend. It all should be fun though. But very busy for sure. I'll try to get better at these posts but it's a lot harder keeping bottles washed and laundry done too now that I'm back at work. Please continue to pray as we begin our journey as mom and dad.

Introducing Aliviah Macelle

I have been waiting to write this post since I started my blog. I haven't really been doing a good job in updating on here. 

David and I flew to ohio on June 13,2014 to wait on her arrival. She was originally due on the 17th. We waited a whole week before little Ms decided to make her appearance. She finally came on June 21, 2014 at 2:50am weighing 6 pounds 15 ounces and 20 inches long. I was so blessed to be able to witness her coming into the world. There is no greater experience than watching a new life be born. That will always be a special bond between the birth mom and me. 

It has been a long journey to this point and I am looking forward to our lives with her. God is forever good and his timing is absolutely perfect. I can't imagine any other baby apart of our family age truly is our answer to prayer. Now I can't wait to get her home and start our lives together. 

End of the waiting chapter of our adoption and all the emotions that goes with it

As David and I prepare to go get Aliviah I have been thinking about our whole adoption journey and how the puzzle pieces have just seemed to fit perfectly. Our creator really does have it all mapped out. I would have never guessed 3 and half years ago when we felt The Lord calling us to parent through adoption that it would take so long (in my books) but actually that 3 years went by pretty fast. Although their were times in the last 3 years I thought this day would never come and I felt hopeless. In the last 3 and half years we had 2 adoption agencies (the first one turned us down but now I see that was in God's plan because we found NCHS which is awesome!) 2 almost placements and countless of waiting and prayers, but I look back and see how it all has worked out. I couldn't have matched us with a better birth family if I would have chosen them myself.  They are truly a perfect match for us. David and I have been so blessed with them involving us throughout the whole process. They have blessed us with ultrasound pictures and videos so that we can experience that too. I can't wait to continue this journey with open adoption and now I get to share the pictures with them and they still get to see Aliviah grow up. That's the beauty of open adoption is Aliviah will always know who they are and there will be no need to search for her birth family when she is older because Lord willing she will have already built a life long relationship with them.

Now that we are less than 2 weeks before we leave to go get her it seems so surreal. Her room is all ready, her bags are packed (now I just need to pack my bags) and we are finishing up the last little bit of paperwork we need and we just finished our last pre-adoption home study with our caseworker. I am feeling all the emotions fit into one bill right. I am feeling ready but like any other first time mom there is that fear of the unknown. I think of our birth family often and more and more as the time gets closer and wonder how they are feeling.

Please continue to pray for this journey as one chapter comes to an end and a new chapter is starting and are lives are about to change forever for the BETTER!

Our soon to be little girl

I am so thankful that we have been blessed with a birth family that is willing to share the special moments with us. The family wants David and I to enjoy this time and to be able to share these moments too. They so generously mailed us some of the ultrasound pictures. So here are just a few ultrasound pictures of Aliviah. I am so thankful for this family!! The Lord truly does have everything mapped out. Enjoy!

The BIG Update!!

I know I have been really quiet on my blog. Actually we have been really busy with the whole adoption thing. We have been attending our Prepare Groups on different topics and life was going on like normal.

I'm actually pleased to announce for the last several months David and I have been working with a birth family. Going through this whole experience has given me more respect for birth families. You know when you are watching TV they always make out birth moms to be a selfish and mean almost like a villain. But I think birthfamilies are the most wonderful people ever. Seriously, they truly are. It takes someone strong and caring to love someone so much that you give them something you can't even if it is hard on them. I seriously could never take what they are doing for David and I for granted. They will ALWAYS have a special place in hearts and our lives.

The more I think about adoption the more I see Christ's love in the whole adoption process. Think about it. God gave up his ONLY Begotten son so that we can be born again into his family. If God never chose to give up his son we would be banned from Heaven forever. God loved us so much he was able to send his son to DIE for us so that we could have a better life in heaven.

So David and I are excited to announce that this June we will be adding to our family through adoption. A little precious baby girl that God has had planned for us all along. So all the heartache and pain we have been through the last 8 years every tears of sadness shed has now turned to tears of joy. Please continue to pray that everything will go according to God's plan and His will be done. So be watching as we go along this journey the next couple of months of bringing our baby girl home.

Ephesians 1:5 - Having predestinated us unto the adoption of children by Jesus Christ to himself, according to the good pleasure of his will,